My aim for this weekend:

Complete Health Take-Home Exam (Total 1500words)
Complete Social Work management essay (Total 2250words)

Fat hope~~~~~ Hahahahah!

I've been reading this book on child abuse by Dave Pelzer. Although i'm sort of reading it backwards... No choice, not every library got the book as its always on loan. I've finished his third book "The man named Dave" in a few short days, and was lucky to find his second book today at Bedok library, "The lost boy". Will source for his first book soon! The classic "The child called it". These are true stories, an autobiography (its called that right...?) But its so saddening, how he grew up, how hard he fought as a child, i really don't want to imagine the stuffs he went through.

If it was me in his situation, i think i would have "returned to meet my makers" already...!

Although i was never abused as a child, i thought i could feel his pain, that i could see why he reacted the way he did, how he was able to forgive his mother, no matter how badly she had treated him as a child... There are certain values that he holds that is similar to mine and certain personality in him that i think i am that way too.

Yes, i'm going back to the book now. Bye! (Been talking a lot about the books i've been reading recently... Wow, i have become a bookworm! Haha, leisure reading is great! Better than my horrendous school readings...!)

Imagine.

A squirrel out on a big oak tree. It peers timidly out of its small little cozy treehole, out into the forest beneath. It figured another fellow squirrel out on the tall branch, calling out to it to join him.

The squirrel scans its surrounding carefully and climbs out slowly, up the thick trunk of the tree towards its friend.

Suddenly, a thunder sounded, and it quickly scurried back into the safe custody of its cozy treehole.

Thats me.

Yea, i know i have chosen to follow this path, to return to full student life. I have not regretted it. Never.

It is just kind of funny, what student's life meant to me, and to others. People envied me for being able to become a student once again. I've never once doubt their envy, coz i've been through what they have, and working life is not exactly fun.

I am a student. But not the normal kind.

A student attends classes in the day, hangs out with friends after that, discuss projects, tutorials and exams together, gossip about that hot bod or cool dude, receives allowance from dad and works part-time at the local bookstore.

I, on the other hand, attends classes at night, most of my schoolmates are working in the day, thus i don't have people to hang out with or study with me, i don't receive allowance from my parents and i'm not working part-time either.

So, i don't feel like the conventional student. Sometimes, i really wished i studied in SIM instead, i may not feel so lonely and lack of support.

But still, the conclusion is that, i don't feel like what a student should feel. And people (especially those around me) kept misunderstanding that, since you study only at night, why can't you do something in the day (work)? Its not as simple as you think okie!? All the work, readings and assignments and no one to share. (I guess its difficult when those who probably share your burdens are your schoolmates and to most of them, school is secondary to them while they have other commitment like work and family). And somehow, to those who were fulltime students like me (i can count 3 others only!), we somehow don't have the culture to want to do work together, probably due to the nature of our coursework, which is pretty individual...

I am a misunderstood soul.

But its okie, i'm usually fine after a little whining and complaining.

Okie, now for some happy news! My trip to San Francisco is confirmed! 25 June to 13 July! Woohoo~! I so look forward to it! See you Vincent brother!

To a dear friend whom i have "fly kite" today...,

I am sorry. I WAS stuck at the fair, but i also admitted that i used the fair as an excuse for not turning up. I don't mind playing badminton (or basketball), but the after-event activity was what made me think twice.

I still have my reservations. I hope you understand. I've always listened to you talk about your mother, you loved her, as much as i love mine. You will never hurt her, as much as i will never hurt mine too.

Read: http://heartofesoul.blogspot.com/2007/03/religious-thoughts.html And you will understand.


I hope not, because of this, that it will jeapordize our friendship, ever. =>

I was just pondering over this question a friend ask me last night. She asked "Alvin, what's your dream car?"

Dream car? Lamborghini? Ferrari? Aston Martin? Well, I'l just leave them in the dreams... Frankly, i don't really have what people envisioned as dream car, i'm just a very practical person who will probably tell you that i'm very much satisfied with just a Mitsubishi Lancer (not the evo okie!).

But I LOVE DRIVING!

And that particularly puzzled people. Usually, people who loves driving, will love cars, and have tonnes of knowledge about engines, spoilers, bumpers, and what have you, but me, i have trouble differentiating between engine oil and petrol...

So why do i adooooree driving so much? I ask myself, and i got the answer. I like to be in control, i need to be in control, and driving gives me control. I decide where i want to go, when i want to go, how i want to go. Of course, i never disregard traffic rules lah.

But don't get me wrong. I'm not a control freak who likes to decide for others how they should run their lives. I just like to be able to be in control of what i do. And i get that satisfaction from driving.

So that sums it. I love driving.

Life's pretty much stagnant... Its like wake up... do readings... eat... do assignments... go class... sleep... REPEAT.

Yup, i have a lot on my mind to do, like:
(1) I plan to learn Sports Climbing
(2) I want to rollerblade
(3) I wanna complete my 2B-license (but i decide i will continue only in July)

The IT training company that i interviewed for as freelance trainer has not yet got back to me... Do they think i'm not good enough for them? Sigh... Seriously, its like the ONLY thing that i want to do now for some income...

I probably won't take up any part-time job as of now, coz i'm too pre-occupied with that damn thesis, for which i still haven't started to pen anything yet..

Maybe...Maybe... after July then i shall seriously look for some jobs... But then, Sep is the start of Block2 placement... Sigh... How?? I probably do tuitioning, but as of now... THESIS!!

Yea! I received a piece of good news from the school yesterday, and i was VERY EXCITED about it! Can't wait to tell Vincent about it! (of which i already did ;) ) My semester 2 is going to be starting only in mid-July! And Sem1 ends 7Jun! So to speak, i have 5-weeks of break, and i can go to San Francisco (this is the first time i spelt the city name correctly, haha! =p) anytime between Mid-Jun to Mid-July! And yes, tickets are waayyyyy cheaper end June than during June holidays! So, now i'l just wait for Vincent to confirm with me whether he wants me to switch with his girlfriend for me to come earlier.

So now its either 13June-26June or 25June-9July! Yea!

Oh! By a stroke of luck, i finally found this famous classical piece that i was trying so hard to locate! (i'm not a classical-music follower you see!) Its this famous piece (i heard it before, so it has to be famous!!) that was incorporated into the song 好朋友 by 罗志祥， and i have been bugging those i knew frantically for the title of this beautful piece. (I was just basically short of humming the tune to HMV's staffs to find out..)

Anyway, i've found it. Canon in D Major - Johann Pachelbel.

Oh, i'm now pretty slow on the Neil Humphreys's last book... Maybe... maybe coz i didn't want it to end. The last book talks about his final tour of Singapore, and his pilgrimage to the many places that were so not well-known to many Singaporean! Frankly, i think the Singapore Tourism Board should consider using his book as the official guide to the little red dot.

I think i'm going to do something people considered stupid, i am going to make a note of the places he visited, and someday, i will go and see it for myself. I feel a tart little ashamed that i learned more about the history of Singapore through a lanky english journalist who grew up in London rather than from Mr Tan (read: my history teacher).

Neil taught me to look at things beyond the surface and to be critical. He visited a place and his interest would be why the place was the way it was (its history). I visited Sentosa and say "Ok, cool place, so where's the beach?".

(hey, i am making free publicity again... hmm...)

Anyway, i quite like his book, his is a much of a cross-cultural work, a local flavour through an english perspective.

Ok! I am soooo looking forward to a brand new day tommorrow! My schedule? Refer line 1 (sigh...) But saturday's gonna be good =)

I haven't made a proper update for a week! Okie... Here goes!

NUS charged me $42 for an ASSESS ONLY card... No borrowing privilege. And they gave me a pathetic piece of blue chic as THE Membership card. Couldn't they like at least give me a plastic card or something.. It would have made my day if they could give me a more decent card. =.="

Well, what to do, when they have half the Singapore's better collections of books, journals, rare materials and goodies to which you can't find in NLB and my school's library. I do need NUS library.

And its a pretty cool place to study, more like a treasure cove. And now, i finally can walk in holding my head high (since i have the assess card remember?) and not sniff around like a rat or thieve not wanting to get caught.

Anyway, school work is starting to kill me recently, i figured i have lots to do, lots to read, lots to catch up on and lots to get my ass cracking. (Cheee, then why am i blogging here... Hmmm...)

And kinda so many thing to attend to these days. Vincent send me a promotion from NWA stating that it cost ONLY $899 to fly from SIN to SFO! After checking it out, i couldn't find any link AT ALL that leads to the named promotion! Upon checking with Vincent, he said his check came up to $2800+ while his girlfriend's check amounted to $3000+. What the ^*%^$*??

Okie... The looks of the number of books stacked on my study table is shocking, and definitely a turn off... I go get my ass cracked now. Bye.

我不会怪你　对我的伪装
I will not blame you for your disguise
　天使在人间是该藏好 翅膀
Angels in the mortal world should conceal their wings
　人们愚蠢鲁莽　而你纤细善良
Human beings are foolish and impertinent, but you're nicety and kind-hearted
　怎能让你为了我被碰伤
How could I ever watch you get hurt because of me?

　小小的手掌　厚厚的 温暖
Those small palms of yours provide me abundance of warmth
　你总能平复我不安的夜晚
You're always there to calm me during periods of restless night
　不敢想的梦想　透过 你的眼光
I've given up my dream/aspiration But through your vision,　
我才看见它原来在前 方
I'm able to see a glimpse of hope again

＊没有谁能把你抢离我身旁
Nobody is going to take you away from me
　你是我的专属天使　为我 能独占
You're my solely my angel only I belong to you
　
＃没有谁能取代你在我心上
Nobody is gonna replace you in my heart
　拥有一个专属天使　 我哪里还需要别的愿望
I've no more desires as I'm contented having a solely angel by my side.

　小小的手掌　大大的 力量
Your're palms are small but strong
　我一定也会像你一样飞翔
I will definitely soar high together with you
　你想去的地方　就是我的 方向
My destination will be wherever you wish to go to
　有我保护笑容尽管灿 烂
I will be here to shield you from any danger, thus, do maintain your brilliant smile

　要不是你出现　我一定还在沉睡
Should you not appear in my life, I would still be deep in my sleep
　绝望的以为　生命只 有黑夜
I dejectedly thought that life is only filled with darkness.

I know, i know, its waaaayyyyyy too early to start asking for birthday pressies... But my friends needs time to prepare for the ultimate gifts mah! Like saving up enough money to buy them... Horhorhor...

So here goes my wish-list:

(1) Sony Ericsson W850i Walkman Phone










(2) Wireless Broadband Router









(3) Transition Lens for Spectacles (Those that turned dark in the light!)








(4) Mitsubishi Colt okok... This is a joke... No one will buy me car...













(Edit: 17 March 2007)

(5) Sling Bag (Sample picture only! Any design also can! =p)








(6) And1 Swingman Mid












Ok! Start saving up peps! I'll be waiting! Wahahaha! =p

my bro thinks that he is in deep shitz... think again...



Haha! Anyway, jia you bro! 1 more week!

Hahaha! I found this lame shitz while browsing YouTube! Its by this taiwan group called Party Boyz (The one formed by Xiao Zhu, Xiao Gui and 3 other members)

(I'm a sucker for YouTube Videos)



Quite 欣赏 罗志祥, i think he is one funny and hardworking guy! And 小鬼 too~~ Although i feel he has lived long enough under the shadows of his 罗主任. He should moved on and become independent le! (Hahahaha!)

I've made some progress with the literature searches! I sure hope that is a good thing! Gonna have to SERIOUSLY read through them tomorrow!

It's almost 3am! I think i will probably wake up at 11+am tomorrow again!

Guoxiong accompanied me for dinner tonight, much appreciated BRO! You could have eaten with your auntie (and have a free meal!) but you chose to eat with me =) Hey, once you fix that KTV session with Jiaqi, just let me know! I will come!
Hmm... Still quite a lot to do!! Tomorrow!

Okie... now... a verrrryyyy old song that i fell in love with! Don't ask me why, i just loved it. YY, you will find this song ultra familiar! Coz we hear it at least once a month! Its played by one of our youth band! =)

To love somebody - Bee Gees (1967)

I really enjoyed myself yesterday. I skipped class =p

I went to the ITShow, and later to this sooooo nice cafe in Selegie.

The ITShow was crapped and i really boooore myself out there. Admittedly, it is the worst place one can be on a Friday evening, especially when (1)you skipped class for this (2)you don't need anything from the fair (3)you aien't got any spare bucks that you might want to splurge on the occasional DVD-ROMs.

Singaporeans are such suckers for this kinda of fairs, why can't they buy printers, DVD-ROMS, and the oh-so-cheap thumbdrives any other times? It is no wonder stall-owners at Sim Lim know how to jack their prices up, knowing well that people will flock to their stalls at the show and grab all the "cheap" items, better still, they throw in those "goodies" like a "Get a Free MousePad for every $2398 you spent", and we will go "I want"!

Now, i am not lamenting that i think Singaporean sucks, they don't, they just allowed companies to dig their graves for them. I, for one, was such a culprit last year when i bought my laptop at a computer fair. Why? For the relatively "cheap" price and the goodies they thrown in. See, i am a sucker too. Now, i haven't regret my laptop, i love it. What i'm trying to say is, Singaporean's mindset allowed business to draw on the fact that we like "discounts" and "goodies", so this kinda of fair allowed them to make huge profits while we satisfy our needs to "get more than we intended".

Ok, enough about the fair.

After our little expedition at the fair, we (Jieming, Steph, HengXin and me) had our dinner at BK and went to a few places namely German Bar, 爱琴海， and finally settled down at Hark Cafe (Cool place!).

I wanted live songs, so i suggested the chill out place at Millenia Walk, but it was full. So we went to 爱琴海 instead. After settling down for 5minutes, we realised that the songs, ambience and age-groups were not really us, so we moved on (Not after i accidentally popped in a piece of potato chip and had to leave sheepishly... Luckily we were not charged, and thanks to Steph for being so braved to ask =p).

So we drove to Selegie and finally settled down at the Hark Cafe. There was a live band, nice songs and some clique dialougue to amuse us... Haha. But overall, it was really nice, the songs they sang, the ambience and the drinks! The cafe encouraged their guests to sing to the live band... But as me and Steph had put it, you have got to be either (1)super thick skinned or (2)sang superbly well to go up. We were neither.

They have really nice programmes seriously, like Men's Night on Wed, Ladies Nights on Tue, Singing Competition on Thu, performances on weekends... Best, the price is not expensive, $8+ per person and we sat through from 11-1+am. I shall go back there again.

Happy TGIF night. =>

Kumar (my Honours Research Tutor) says that it is a normal process to feel lost at this stage. And it's the feeling of being lost and being frustrated that is part and parcel of doing an Honours thesis.

I trust him.

Coz lost and frustrated is what i am feeling right now.

I am getting an NUS library access card, going to eat, sleep, live in NUS library sooner or later.

(Besides trying to earn a few bucks to live... I realise i am getting low on funds)

Sorry to Kee Choon, its as if i trick you to have dinner with me, yet i ended up being late and only taking a drink.

Tan Kuang Hong! I know you came and you had read my whining entries! If not, you wouldn't have been able to talk to me the whole afternoon on the so many topics that i found ever so familiar. Namely, career, religion and conversational english. I only feign ignorance. >.^

Anyway, thanks! For taking time to update yourself a little about your dear friend before meeting him, for accompanying him to Tui Na and of course also for passing him so many DVDS to watch. (He have thus finished watching DOA, and thinks its nice!)

Anyway, i went Tui Na today because i sprained my ankle like 4-weeks ago... And it still haven't heal, so i thought i better have it checked...

This clinic, located at Kovan, has got at least 30-years of chinese physician experiences (according to my mother), and have even treated my uncle (who has now became a grandfather already).

This visit is nothing short of excitement!

Now, my idea of the chinese treatment for injured ankles was... well... to have my sorry leg twisted and turned and for me to be yelling "Oh god, save me!". Nothing came close to that, the whole time, my wonderful physician was massaging my ankle with this "warm rock" which made me feel oh-so-wonderful, all the time...

Now, forgive me for being ignorant about the chinese-style of treatment, but i seriously did not know that you can bake chinese medication before applying them! And forgive my poor observation skills that i actually did not see this big antique oven right in front of me until i saw my medication being hoarded in to bake... He was going to bake a cake and wrap them around my leg! Now isn't that exciting?

Tink

My "cake" is ready! He took it out of the oven and my mind when "Oh my god, please tell me you are not going to apply it to me now!!" The goddamn "cake" was steaming! I could see smoke protruding from all its surfaces, and mind you, it wasn't exactly a small piece of "cake" you're looking at. Its at least 15cm by 7cm.

Phew

He continued to massage my ankle while the "cake" cooled. And finally, after he applied the "cake" to my ankle, i felt good. It has got a warm, fuzzy feeling. And i smiled.

Yup, thats my (not so much) experience with Tui Na, for now, here's a picture of my poor poor leg:

I have thoughts of giving up the Honours Thesis... I'm such a quitter... NOOOO!

I must hang in there! Its only the second week. Sigh... They tell me its the starting that is difficult, i truly hope so. Coz its reaaalllly difficult!

I must pull something out... Honours makes a big difference in the civil service! And civil service is where i want to be. I think people must be thinking, stupid idiot, theres a much better world out there! The private sectors will give better!

Sigh, no, i don't like the too competitive and "dark" outside world. I just want a happy simple life. (Although i heard of conspiracy within climbing the public ladders as well... oh well... but may not be as bad right). Besides, i hold a Social Work degree, what do i do with it in the private sector? Admin executive? Or Customer Service Officer?

Anyway, my career path is more or less decided! I know where i am heading. I just don't know how to put it across to others.

I WILL BECOME A SENIOR PRISONS OFFICER.

I want to be in a job that makes a difference to others, to touch others life. So it will not be just a job, it will be what people called "PASSION". Some thing that sitting down in front of the desk churning programming codes will not bring me.

I also want to be in a job which holds a certain level of authority. To satisfy my own internal self-satisfying need to be in control. (Sadistic huh)

I hold a social work degree. Which means, i am trained to help. So i will do it. And did you know that, for the whole goddamn social service, the pay isn't very remarkable. So, to enable my family, my mum, dad, my future wife and children to lead a fairly comfortable life, i think this job should accomplish that. =)

I think people might argue, then its a waste of your social work education! No. My social work background will enable me to be able to better work with these group of people. I am trained to empathised with them, to address their issues and to see things in the social work perspective. So wasted? Nah.

Its just wasted to the Social Service sector that after training me, i am not going to call myself a social worker by designation. Although i still consider myself being part of the social service field. Some might not.

There are some thoughts that i had wanted to tell last night too. On Saturday, i rejected 2 invitations to 2 different church activities. Why? Coz i know its wrong for me to go.

If you asked me, am i a Christian, a Buddhist or a Taoism. I will tell you, i am neither.

I was involved with the Trinity Church for a while last year, and to be honest, i like being there. I loved the services (though i don't like cell for some reason, no not the people, its just that i don't like cell generally). And yea, they were inviting me to return, but i kept pushing them off.

I have my reasons. I liked the words of the bible. But i don't think i will ever commit should my ties with my family remains. The reason, my mother. A very devoted Taoist, very adhering to its belief and will dutifully pray on the 1st, 15th and 30th of the lunar month, not forgetting the many BIG festivals on which even today, i can't remember except for a few. Its amazing, that i'm not influenced in her ways, although i go to the temple once in a while.

She doesn't really take into the idea that i attend services. And i can totally understand that. She put in a lot of effort for the family, especially in 2006, where the family went through many dark times together. I'm not talking about what happened, but it was a tough ride. Besides that, besides what we were going through, she enthusiastically supported me in my studies, knowingly well how much it costs.

So tell me, what can i do? I am indebted. I will NEVER DO THINGS THAT HURT HER!

For seeing the pain she goes through, i will never hurt her this way by doing things against her wish. Cause, never in my life will i ever be able to repay her for whatever she did and is doing for me.

I hope you understand.

I have a little chat with my dear friend, Phyllis, on our way home together last night. She asked me if i was "always uncomfortable around girls?" Hell no. Why would i be? I am not gay.

But i'm not surprise she made such an observation. Coz i tend to be quieter among them (the girls), choosing to shut up. Why you might ask me. I think i am pretty conscious of myself. And i kinda undertood myself as someone not capable of many intelligent thoughts, so i thought i better not make a fool of myself, by talking crap... Especially when i feel my command of the English Language is not that up to notch (some people might laugh at this!)

But i think it sucks when i wanted to express some feelings in English, and the words just dosen't come out right. And i don't know if i am wrong to say this, but i think this is fairly common in Singapore, where many people tend to be able to converse better in Mandarin but write better in English. Coz i think i write pretty well (well, at least a little better than me writing in Mandarin).

What to do, when i grew up in a family where Mandarin/Teochew was pre-dominantly the primary language. In school (pri/sec/poly), i converse mainly in Mandarin. When i enter Army, worst, i started conversing in a mixture of Hokkien+Mandarin... So, how/when did i had the chance to brush up my conversational English? Well, it must be after i ORD and started working. Over the past few designations that i've being brought through, i was "forced" to converse in English. As a teacher in RGS (English is the median for education remember?), as a Trainee Probation Officer (i don't converse English with my probationers, but my colleagues were mainly England-speakers...) and finally as a staff of SCS where there were people other than the usual cheenas. Of course, school and discussion helps.

Anyway, i hope my confidence in this improve (a lot). Coz i'm gonna be starting full-time work next year!

Today marks the 1st year anniversary. If you know what i mean.

Saturday. The initial plan was, to go for MCYS briefing (in the morning), come back, and do my readings.

In the end...

I have to meet YY for lunch at TPY Lor 1, because she conveniently made me her official photocopying machine by asking me to make copies of her application forms and some emails to pass to her BY TODAY!

Not that i minded, Lor 1 is only 10minutes away from MCYS and i needed a lunch kahki anyway.

Then after lunch, we decidedly head off to our old office at JSSC. Because i gave the idea that "Hey, its Saturday, theres Band! Let's visit them and hear them Jam!" What supposedly was the planned short visit then turned out to be an incredibly long and fun "catching up" session with the boys, coupled with games of Pool (of which i lost every single 1 of them >.<"), chats and band songs.

Finally left at around 3plus to head out (again) to Raffles City, answering Hwee Ping last minute call-out for a meet-up. And i am amazed at how this girl arrange to meet with her friends. She said "Meet Town", so where is "town"? I simply assumed we were going to meet at City Hall, since i suggested going to the career fair. But no, she SMS to ask me where we meeting, and i was like "Not City Hall meh!?" Lucky she didn't complain.

Waited for her at Bread and Toast (i think i laughed too hard with my youths, until i became super hungry again, so i went to eat). So while waiting for her, i chatted with Kuang Hong over the phone regarding "yesterday". She arrived, stole my bread (no lah, i couldn't finish) and we left for the fair.

It was somehow a lucky thing that i visited the fair again today. Because yesterday when i went and wanted answers about career as a Prison Officer, only the HR people were around (i think coz its Fri and they thought it a waste of resources to place more people there), and i really don't think they know much about experiences of the trainings the officers go through.

But today was different, they have a couple of REAL Prisons Officer and he could better answer my questions of the job. => And Hwee Ping was interested too, so she asked questions too, and i learned.

After the fair, we wandered around and i suddenly had the urge to catch a show, so we ended up having a quick dinner and caught "The Pursuit of HappYness", the show by Will Smith. I think its a nice and touching show, but overall depressing... I cannot imagine the emotional traumas he is going through, but neither could i not agree more when he had to put his young son through the same hardship as him when he could live with his mother instead. I also can't believe why under a situation where he was facing bankruptcy, tonnes of bills on the table and a leaving wife could he still decide not to look for a "normal" job and rather choose to sign up as a salary-less stockbroker trainee which could truly end him up as a "broker".

Well, i wouldn't know if my choice of his would have ended up with the same success he enjoyed, but under THAT circumstances, i reaaallly would find a job.

Anyway, after the movie, we bumped around a little more while she went on to buy 2 necklaces (supposedly her way of congrating herself for passing her goddamn psy paper), and we went our separate way. By then i was quite shag already, having woke up at 8.30am this morning.

But a very productive day i call it! Although, in the end, my readings is still neatly resting on my shelves.



Moral of the story: Don't plan your day. =p

(Side-track: I decided to remove "Comments" and the "ChatBox" on this blog. Because even with my over-zealous prompting to friends who visits my blog to "Say something" and to ALL my invisible (read:unknown) patrons who pop by to read my whining entries, no one says anything. So... i better remove it, it just made me looked pathetic. Contact me if someone actually wanted it back.)

Today marks the end of my FIRST week daily lessons in school. Gosh i am so tired!

It is seriously no joke to go to school everyday! Even though it is just 2hours a day. I seriously wonder how i managed to wake up at 6am and stayed awake listening to monologuely-programmed teachers rambling 1+1 when i was only six years old. Kudos to kids these days, i would jolly well wandered off to lalaland.

But then again, these kids don't have 32529-yellow-pages of readings to read everyday, and another 3987 essays to write which can amount to 15130679712158 number of words!

Okie, i am exaggerating. But i do really have a lot of readings to do and 10 other #^%&* essays to write. To top it off, i also have a thesis on which i still have absolutely no idea what to write.

I am just sulking. But the thing is, i can't get myself to work during the day. So i burn 2 nights trying to get somethings done. On a happier note, i managed to get a little moving. Maybe, i should work by night and sleep until its time for me to go for classes.

Oh, i was a little disappointed when Kuang Hong (who promise to help me ask about a temp job - which he did) told me that they don't need people for the time being. Hmm...

Actually, i wanted to do a little teaching. Just like what i used to do 1 year ago at this time. Should i not hold back and try to ask my ex-company if they wanna me to come back? My ideal time schedule is to teach in the morning (since schools usually morning sessions now), fuck off by noon and head off to library or something to do schoolworks, and finally head off to class at night.

I haven took much pictures recently, so sian, i wanna keep more memories of myself. Memories of me sulking away, rotting in the decay of modern society waiting for the big erky flies to feast on my rotting body. No, serious, i want to take pictures!

I have always had an interest to indulge in pleasure reading (not my horrendous yellow pages! but nice novels)! And my latest book is making an idiot out of me on the MRT, by tickling me to, literally speaking, LAUGH OUT LOUD. I am reading the inks of Neil Humphreys' Notes from an even smaller Island. His light-hearted way of putting an issue/a culture across to another is simply magical. And certainly, his way of writing has very much now influence the way i write! Love it. Although he really did make me look like an idiot in the train.